Condoms

Condom with Inflatable Portion

patent#: US 6895967

The title and picture pretty much say it all – this rubber provides extra girth when you need it. But don't just pump, and, well, pump. A well placed squeeze can do wonders. This jimmy hat can be "repetitively inflated and deflated at desired times," much like the man's ego when he's told, "Yes, I want to sleep with you, but can we do something about that anorexic worm you call a penis?"

Like all good things there is some risk involved (though this is far from the riskiest I've seen). In the heat of the moment, a forearm might spasm and this thing is going to pop like bubble wrap in a porcupine nest. Next thing, the manufacturer is getting sued for child support payments and gonorrhea salve.

I shouldn't knock it until I've tried it, but personally, I can think of more enjoyable ways of getting blown. Common sense will tell you, balloons and pricks are best kept separate.

filed under Condoms
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posted on 6/9/2006, patent issued on 5/24/2005