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A, B, C, D, E, F, G... I've got all those size tit-ties.

This bizarre breast implant can be resized at any time by the wearer--like a basketball! There is actually a valve that sticks out of the surface of the wearer's skin that allows you to expand the implant with air or a fluid. I smell a new fetish...

Yes, it was invented by a man.

filed under Breast "Enhancement", Beauty
more | comments (13)
posted on 5/31/2005, patent issued on 4/5/2005

Electromagnetic Wave Proof Cup Structure for Bra

patent#: US 6814647

There was a girl who was blessed,
With two glorious orbs upon her chest.
You should have seen them when she undressed,
Each one was bigger than a hornets nest!
(Though gentler to the touch, I attest).

She, too, with them was obsessed,
She told me her secret, at my request,
Of how she maintained her glorious breasts.
In tit protection she did invest:

"When it comes to breasts,
Get the best!
Protect them from polluting pests.
Radiation makes a boob depressed.
It takes a good bra to pass my test.
Before this one, I wore a bullet proof vest."

filed under Breast "Enhancement", Underwear
more | comments (1)
posted on 11/9/2004, patent issued on 11/9/2004

Air Filled Brassiere

patent#: US 6811463

Get ready to inflate your breast size ladies, it's bubble wrap for breasts! Gentlemen, be careful pinning on that corsage.

filed under Breast "Enhancement", Underwear
more | comments (0)
posted on 11/2/2004, patent issued on 11/2/2004

Breast Implant Sizing Apparatus and Method

patent#: US 6796875

A try-before-you-buy approach to breast implants.

Experiment with different breast sizes at home by filling this special bra with different amounts of fluid. Literally go through the ABCs of cup sizes.

filed under Breast "Enhancement", Underwear
more | comments (2)
posted on 9/28/2004, patent issued on 9/28/2004

Anti-Wrinkle Bra for Sleeping

patent#: US 6769955

There once was a desperate old hag,
Who bought a bra she saw in a mag.
She wore it at rest,
To un-wrinkle her breasts.
They kept smooth, but boy did they sag!

filed under Underwear, Breast "Enhancement"
more | comments (2)
posted on 8/3/2004, patent issued on 8/3/2004

Breast "Enhancement"

Hinging Breast Implant

patent#: US 6875233